Lick ya later!

I’ve been writing this blog for a good while now and have never mentioned the L Word. Why? Do I really need to tell you that Gabriella and I watch the L Word? So cliché! I don’t have to tell you about driving the mini-van either, but you know I’m tearing down the roads of suburbia in my Odyssey. I have a love-hate relationship with both the L Word and my mini-van which is probably why I don’t refer to either that often. I try to avoid anything that further pigeon holes me as a suburban housewife, and I leave the recaps and reviews of lesbian programming to the lesbian entertainment bloggers. You’re spoiled for choice, so you don’t need me telling you what’s what on the L Word. I’m making this one exception because last night was the last episode ever of the L Word – a show we watched because it was about lesbians, by lesbians and for lesbians...and straight people who tuned in purely out of an anthropological interest, of course. The hooters had nothing to do with it.

While it was no Sopranos or Six Feet Under, we always tuned in because we were not under the delusion that we would ever see ourselves reflected in any of the characters or their cringe-worthy situations. We watched because there were no other programs entirely about lovely ladies loving ladies. And because we love our trash tv.

After the first season-the novelty wore off, and we mistakenly tuned in every week in search of character development, continuity and some girl on girl action. Well 1 out of 3 ain’t bad when the 1 thing is the girl on girl action. Having said that, the soft-porn scenes were hit or miss. Still, we watched hopefully, occasionally finding a bit of magic.

R RATING (like the rest of my blog for f-sake!)


Part of the appeal was having lesbian water-cooler talk in which everyone could participate. It was the great common denominator for any and all lesbians except for the few who either don’t own a television or are too high brow to watch. Guess when you don’t know what you’re missing...like those straight girls who haven’t ever had a brush with bush. So sad, but then they’ll never know. Oh, c’mon, ladies. I’m just ribbing you a little. "That’s why there are 31 flavours of ice cream," my dear mother always said.

For the past 7 years, we’ve all had the same conversations at some point. Who are you on the L Word? Who’s your free spin? Do hate anyone more than Jenny? Which of the many characters axed after only a few shows would you bring back? Cybill Shepherd’s daughter is really a lesbian? Kate Moenning is Gwyneth Paltrow’s cousin? It’s been a fun show to ridicule and a fun show to watch with friends especially with a cocktail in hand. I don’t mean to hate. We wouldn’t have watched it had it been purely awful ... like Exes and Ohs. Ouch, Deborah!

Last night, we toasted our many gatherings with Mindy’s Frozen White Grape Martinis and Gabriella’s Spring Rolls with soy, ginger dipping sauce followed by hot n spicy chicken wings. The perfect finger food. And who doesn’t like eating with your fingers? Steady!

And at last, Jenny is gone for good. But so, my friends are all the ladies who grew on us like a fungus requiring medicated ointment.

Farewell to Bette who started out cold and self-absorbed and became pussy-whipped and vulnerable, or was that Shane? Shane followed in Arthur Fonzerelli’s footsteps and became increasingly uncool with every season culminating in the disastrous co-dependent hook up with Jenny. Eesh!

Good-bye to Tina who was always sliding up and down the irritating-scale. So long to Kit who was never given a decent story line after her relationship with Ivan. And to Max whose bearded face and pregnant body was a car crash from which we could not avert our eyes. Toodle pip to Helena’s slow and painful journey from cruel villain to caring and uninteresting friend.

Alice in a prison spin-off? Really? If you got Cybill and Jane together again, I’m in for the long haul. They never disappointed.

We’ll have to see what happens with Alice in Pokeyland. No expectations.

It’s a rainy, gray day in Northern New Jersey. It’s as if Mother Nature herself is mourning the loss of lesbian trash television. Who will fill the void? Not sure - perhaps because my thoughts are a wee bit muddled this morning. After one too many Mindy Martinis and numerous hot wings, I’m happiest positioned close to a loo. I may be older, but I’m clearly not wiser when it comes to drinking....late on a Sunday night...when our children wake up at the crack of ass. And I’d do it all over again. Here’s to you, L Word and to all the lesbian programs to come now that you’ve popped the cherry. Lick hymen! I mean, l’chaim!

In honor of the L Word and rainy days, I give you Gabriella's Fish Soup.

Ingredients:
3 Tbsp Olive oil
1 tsp Crushed pepper flakes
2 Onions
3 cloves Garlic
2 pieces Orange peel
2 pieces ground Ginger
2 Carrots
2 Celery
Box of small cherry Tomatoes
10 Shitake mushrooms
2 tsps salt
1 cup Dry White wine
2 cups water
1 large bunch of Parsley (finely chopped)
1 large bunch of Basil (finely chopped)
2 -3 pieces Cod
2 -3 pieces Tilapia
Or any kind of dense white fish or you can add some shell fish

Saute onions through celery in olive oil until soft. Add tomatoes, mushrooms and parsley cook for 2 - 3 mins. Add wine. Let liquid evaporate, add fish, water and basil and let simmer for 15 mins. Taste for seasoning – add salt if required. Serve in bowls with warm crusty Italian bread rubbed with garlic.