Gabriella: I’m going to buy a new grill now.
Deborah: Why, is your Lesbian License up for renewal?
G: Our grill is officially dead after only a couple of years. I’m getting a Weber.
D: Because you hate my people?
G: They’re my people, too.
D: At least we know that German Research & Development has proven that they can char just about anything.
G: If I buy anything else, we’ll just be shelling out cash every few years to get a new one. Do you want to waste that kind of money?
D: How much is a Jew worth?
G: I’m going to buy a Weber now unless you can find another grill that is just as good.
D: …she said with her car keys in hand.
G: Do you want to do a quick search right now?
D: Sure, Goebbel-ella.
G: Just check out Consumer Reports please.
D: hmmm. Says here they like the Vermont Castings grill. Made in Canada. I love Canada, don’t you?
G: Ok, check out the ‘cons’. One reviewer said the porcelain coating started to peel after 2 months and they rust out in 3 years.
D: He recommends the Weber. Clearly an anti-Semite. Look! His name is Erik. With a K! I rest my kase…with a K.
G: Deborah. Find me an alternative, or I’m getting a Weber.
D: So, if I can’t find an alternative for you right now, it will be my fault that we own a Weber? Screw it. I can’t find a better grill.
D: Auf wiedersehen.